My Goal: Christmas

I have about 150k words typed towards my book.  The upper limit of a fantasy novel is 200k.  As I reread my work, I know there are parts that are going to get rewritten since my first draft is grossly lacking.  It's far more tell than show.  But my goal is to have a rough first draft by Christmas.  I think I can do it.  It's only taken me half of my life to get to this point. 

Chris has asked me if I've looked into publishers.  The entire idea is quite daunting.  But I don't want to settle for self publishing.  This book is for me, writing because I love writing and this story is clawing its way to freedom.  If I go the route of self-publishing first, then it makes me feel like I'm doing it for the money, which I'm not because I have a great job and I enjoy what I do.  Is it important to me that other people read my book?  I don't know.  I think I'd like to share it with friends and family.  I think it would greatly please me to hold a physical copy of my book in my hands, complete with cover art and synopsis, just to say that I did it.  I got the story down on paper.  And for that reason, I don't want just an e-book either. 

I don't know if I'd ever be able to make it big as a writer.  I ask "why" all too often.  Not "why won't I make it".  That's not the issue.  It's also not "why do I write".  I know that.  But "why does Derhan not eat Kieser?"  "Why doesn't he just use this power and get the whole thing over with?"  "Why don't they see that attack coming?"  With each question, it morphs into further considerations and tweaking of the story.  Tweaks in the story cause the butterfly effect.  I think way too much.  But who knows?  Maybe I'll get a following like my favorite authors have and be a top seller.  I think I'd be able to sell at least 10 copies (with the support of my family).  Heck, I'd even autograph them!  But before I get carried away, I better get back to writing.  Christmas is my goal.  Wish me luck!