I cannot tell a lie.

Polygraph tests are stressful!

There I sit in a chair, staring at a blank white wall, holding perfectly still atop a computerized pad.  A blood-pressure cuff cuts off circulation to my left arm.  Two metal sensors are strapped to the fingers of my right hand.  Coils stretch across my abdomen and chest.

I've always considered myself a person of honesty and integrity.  Wow.  A life of rationalizing situations comes to rear it's ugly face in the light of a emotionless computer.  First off, it's not fun to spill your guts in front of a stranger.  And then there are those things that you don't think about, but your body knows.  Self-doubt it the mortal enemy.  Question: Do you remember a time when you lied to someone who loved and trusted you?  Answer: No.  No, I don't remember a time.  But the body says "well, I don't remember a time, but I probably did."  Verbally, I answered the question with complete truth.  Self-doubt makes it come across as a lie.

Stealing, now that's a topic of interest.  I don't take other people's property and I don't shoplift.  Do you steal from your employers?  The worst thing I could come up with was that I was planning to take a steno notebook and a selection of pens home with me, but haven't yet.  They're still sitting on my desk at work, but I still felt bad about considering doing such a deed.  Have you ever lied to your employer?  No, what would I have to lie about?  I answered no to both questions and he addressed them after the test was done, saying that my body told a different story.  For example, have you ever called into work sick when you weren't really sick?  Doh!  I guess that classifies as stealing and lying.  My brain never registered such events when the question was asked, but my body did.

Drugs were the easy part.  Never done them.  Never sold them.  Never been around them.

I had no issue talking about the topic of sex since I've only ever been with one man, my husband.  But I found it interesting when he was discussing what sexual activity was illegal in Idaho, even when people don't think of it as a crime.  Having homosexual sex is illegal.  Having sex with animals is illegal (and just plain gross, in my opinion).  Having sex before you're married is illegal.  That's right people.  It's Idaho's law.

The examiner said that he saw no large red flags that would instantly reject my suitability for the job, but I'll still wait and wonder whether or not I'm good enough to work for the Idaho State Police Department.